Sunday pondering…

Good evening!

I’m a blogging on my phone tonight; a new laptop 👩‍💻 is on the way!

Fell into some regret today, some dissatisfaction with my way of doing things because I began to compare my way to others and that is never a good thing! I am me, the only me I know! I must do as I see fit with the many gifts God has given me.

I had a good weekend though! Not too much trouble 👿 but if I was perfect what fun would that be? I visited my dad which was hard but recovered today with some prayer , walking, gardening and taking a drive with my pup!

Much thought lately about my childhood; it was a strict one. Still affects me today. Journaling really helps me to discover current patterns that may stem from my upbringing. More will be revealed…

I’ve already mapped most of my week out and hopefully nothing interferes with my plans. Gardening, writing, walking and organizing my home cleaning schedule with the Tomm method. Excited about my week 😊🙏

Wishing you all well!

Pax

Victoria

Negative symptoms of schizophrenia and ginkgo…

As I have previously written, I have had a terrific breakthrough since last year dealing with the negative symptoms of schizophrenia/schizoaffective disorder by starting to take ginkgo bilboa by way of Shaklee Mental Acuity. Well my discovery was totally validated recently when I stumbled across a study on different interactions with herbs and schizophrenia. Allow me to take you on my recent path.

I was googling honeybush tea and schizophrenia to make sure that it was recommended. Well I didn’t find the tea but it is a wonderful pick me up for those low moments in the day! Instead I found proof of the wonderful benefits of this herb for those affected with this disorder.

The title of the study is called Updates and Additions for Herbal Contraindications & Drug Interactions plus Herbal Adjuncts with Medicines, fourth edition by Francis Brinker, N.D. He or she writes, ” A systematic review of ginkgo as an adjunct to antipsychotics in treating chronic schizophrenia assesses 8 randomized, placebo-controlled, double-blind studies with 1033 patients enrolled, including 571 using ginkgo extract and 462 taking placebo. Ginkgo extract with antipsychotics significantly amelioreted [made better] total and negative symptoms, compared to placebo, with no distinguishable differences in adverse effects.” Guys beware though who take Risperdone with taking this supplement. I take Risperdone and have no adverse affects.

If you wish to read more about negative symptoms just hit my search feature to the left of the title of my blog.

I have much more to say about this but I’m tired so will post this and share more soon.

peace, love light and joy

Victoria

It’s Friday!

Not that that means a lot to me because I don;t work a m-f job but my husband does so it is reason to celebrate for him. A lot going on and will share soon. I have found support by researchers on the link between schizophrenia and ginkgo bilboa for negative symptoms. Will be doing a full report soon but the reality of my own experience and this report really makes me want to scream from the rooftops.

My computer has been acting up so partially why been silent and why I am making this very short as to get it out there. Hope you all have a great weekend and will be blogging very soon my findings in the study.

peace love light and joy

Victoria

Updates on Mental Health groups…

Good evening!

Been stuck in my own head trying to wrap my brain around all the new groups I have been attending starting last week! I haven’t felt like blogging because of this and just haven’t really been in the mood. So tonight I lit a candle and am burning incense to inspire me. It’s working!

I want to share a few things I have learned so far and to share that it has all been the most positive helpful experience so far! These are the free mental health groups that I found and it is all virtual and local if things ever open up again I can meet the faces on Zoom. They do have a few in person groups but you have to wear two masks and I can barely breathe with one so I’m like nah. I’ll wait:)

The first class I attended was on coping with loss. Just three of us so very intimate. I shared my story about my dad still being alive paralyzed partially after some major strokes and how hard it is after close to 5 years living like this with my dad being alive but unable to talk to him because he sleeps so much:( The group was very sympathetic and I really liked learning that everything I am going through is normal for grief processing. I shared how I just don’t think about it or allow myself to, because it makes me so sad. This is ok! I thought it was wrong, forgetting about my dad, my heart and soul. But it is not. It is survival and an excellent coping mechanism

Next group was on dealing with depression and anxiety. What I got the most from this was that we need to use our wise mind. See diagram below. We all have a rational mind and emotional mind and balancing the two leads to using your wise mind. It has helped me greatly in making some pretty important decisions as of late. This is a DBT model if you are interested in learning more about using your wise mind.

Today I virtually attended a sound bath with crystal bowls. It was pretty cool and got me so relaxed that I have not done anything after until now! Would be better on a day when I don’t have a lot to do but it was nice to be relaxed for a few hours.

And last but not least was the DRA group. Dual recovery anonymous. Very interesting. It was a larger size than the others and there were three people who had been clean and sober for many many years. It gave me hope but I’m bummed because the class is only once a week and this week I have an appointment at that time:( It was also interesting because 4 people in the group myself included carried the dx of Schizophrenia and two of them were the ones with a lot of clean time. No nothing! I am inspired!

So that is the recap of what has been going on in my days. I try to only attend one group a day so it isn’t overwhelming. This week I plan to attend Intuitive eating and health; Increasing self-love and compassion; yoga and a couple more but I forget. I just have to organize my days around them so restructuring my time is a bit of a challenge but navigating it as best as I can.

I must be gentle with myself though and not get too overwhelmed by information but the groups aren’t demanding and they are very lbqgt+ oriented so it is a good mix of all types of people with all sorts of disorders. I’m glad I’m pretty good at not comparing myself to others. I am more on the vocal side but that’s just me. Some people are so quiet but often the same people are in each group so it’s nice to see familiar faces.

That being said though and I will say I have been journaling quite a bit lately and really discovering who I am. I am especially obsessed with my childhood and my upbringing. I’ve been making some connections lately which is great just don’t know yet what to do with the information. Perhaps one of these groups will help.

Hope this is helpful for ya’ll.

peace love light and joy

Victoria

Life is short and long…

Found out today from a reputable source in the schizophrenia field that covid is especially dangerous for people with schizophrenia. She wasn’t sure why but I want to encourage you all to take good care😊 I got my first vaccine already so I’m happy about that.

I also like staying home. It’s wonderful to support local families in their endeavors to make money. Just bought some cute Easter 🐣 bags for all my loved ones! Delivered and all!

Happy Good Friday to all of you. It has been a somber day…

Peace love light and joy

Victoria

Late night musings…

Welcome to my mind where drama still exists maybe more than others, maybe less but for me it is not always a safe place. I get myself into trouble, not police haha. But around 2pm-3pm every day I get really anxious. I’m pretty good at figuring things out so am going to tackle this as well. Maybe some cbd oil, hate to take more anxiety meds but never abuse it so I will try cbd oil first and then if that doesn’t help take a half a klonapin. It really sucks. I’ll be having a great day and then wham I don’t know what to do.

I have tried various measures like planning my day out the night before and it has helped me to be more productive and organized but I am lost at that time. Anybody else experience a time of day like this of restlessness?

Anyway, today was a beautiful day in sunny California. Gardened with my daughter in the evening when it cooled down. It was actually 82 degrees here today!

Didn’t feel like writing my book today but still waiting for my editor to proof the rough draft but still much to do.

I am getting ready for Easter dinner for family on Sunday so much to do! I love having my close family over and especially with my pregnant daughter in law not able to entertain so it falls on me for now. I don’t mind. I have some flowers I need to buy and plant in a half wine barrel my hubbie found somewhere hehe. And I am painting my kitchen cabinets white with new black knobs. Red tulips on my black and white checkered tablecloth. I love order!

Another windfall of money came my way. I can’t believe it but put it straight in savings except for flowers! I have manifested this with and without hard work. I am now trying to manifest more connection with my kids. It’s working. I don’t care about money but do care about my loved ones. Going to make a donation to my favorite charity CureSZ and start a mutual fund for my future grandchild like my mom did for mine!

Balance is my mindset right now with everything. No more extremes I’m really gonna try. Today was great and terrible. Tomorrow I’m going for even keel.

Starting my new mental health program tomorrow on loss. We shall see!

Hope ya’ll have a great night.

peace, love light and joy

Victoria